“Shame-Less”: Powerful Tips to Combat Shame
When it comes to dealing with shame, it's essential to approach it with compassion and understanding. Easier said than done, right? Here’s the thing…you are not alone in having it, and avoiding it won’t make it go away. So, if you are ready to step outside of the shame shadow, read on!
Here are some easy-to-understand "hacks" to help you navigate feelings of shame:
Normalize shame: Remind yourself that shame is a common human emotion. Everyone experiences it at some point in their lives. Recognizing that you're not alone can help you feel less isolated and more accepting of your feelings.
Separate shame from guilt: Understand the difference between shame and guilt. Guilt is feeling bad about something you've done, while shame is feeling bad about who you are as a person. By recognizing this distinction, you can address the specific behavior or action without attacking your self-worth.
Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. The key to tapping into this, even in the hardest of moments, is to ask yourself what you would tell a close friend.
Challenge negative self-talk: When you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, actively challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if there's any evidence to support them.
Identify triggers: Become aware of situations or events that trigger feelings of shame. Knowing your patterns can help you better prepare for and cope with these emotions when they arise.
Focus on growth and learning: Instead of dwelling on past mistakes, view them as opportunities for growth and learning. Understand that making errors is a natural part of the human experience, and it's through these experiences that we can evolve and improve.
Set realistic expectations: Avoid setting impossibly high standards for yourself. Be realistic about what you can achieve, and celebrate your progress, no matter how small.
Share your feelings: Talking about your shame with someone you trust can be therapeutic. It helps break the cycle of isolation and self-judgment. You might find that others have experienced similar feelings and can offer empathy and support. Shame dissipates when light shines on it…so rather than hiding it, expose it. Want a safe place to try it? Pop into humanest and anonymously post in our message boards; feel the love and support, and you are guaranteed to be one step closer to saying goodbye to your shame demons.
Remember, it's okay to ask for help, and addressing shame is a process that takes time and patience. Be gentle with yourself as you work through these feelings, and know that you are deserving of love and acceptance.
